Tri Nations Rugby Boks squeak in and Irish round up

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From the bottom of the ruck can exclusively reveal that after intensive half an hour research that Pieter De Villiers and Robbie Deans hatched a conspiracy to give the All Blacks easy wins and make them massively overconfident for next years world cup and set them up for a big fall.The fallout from this explosive revelation could rival that of the cheating Pakistan cricketers, and will probably make a few internet headlines whatever happens.

To continue maintaining the illusion that the All Blacks are far and away the best team in the world at the moment, Australia and South Africa played out a 9 try “thriller” leading to speculation that neither side knew who was supposed to win.

Pieter De Villiers and Robbie Deans are thought to have been overheard after the match at Loftus:

Pieter: “Do you think they’ll catch us?”
Robbie: “Naah”
Pieter: “Did you see their faces in New Zealand when I claimed there was a conspiracy? Little did they know!”
Robbie: “My performance review might a little tricky this year”
Pieter: “What’s a performance review?”
Robbie: “It’s a review of my performance by the NZRU every year.”
Pieter: “Don’t you mean the ARU?”
Robbie “Yeah, whatever”

OK, enough messing around, time for the serious match review.

After wandering for 40 days and 40 nights in the desert, verily it did come to pass that the Bok that used to be known for spring but doth only gently hop now managed to trip a passing Wallaby. In fairness, in terms of the Bokke’s recent results it was a thrashing and a big turn up to produce decent performances two weeks in a row. It was probably also a golden opportunity spurned by the Wallabies to get that monkey off their back and record a win on the Highveld (a monkey on the back of a Wallaby?).

Pieter De Villiers neck is probably safe again but Robbie Deans’ collar will be starting to feel uncomfortably tight. The defense coaches are surely going to get the sack after this 9 try extravaganza. And the gallows builders will be testing the trap for Habana who looks like he should be afforded some well deserved R and R for about 6 months.

For the Boks, sending out a different team every week is hardly going to help the defense. Last week’s combo, Habana aside, looked like the right mixture of youth and experience and should have been stuck with. For the Aussies, it’s one that got away, but a big step up from last year.

Curtly Beale had a good match and James O’Connor had the knack of being in the right place at the right time. Adam Ashley Cooper has taken the ‘When in Rome…’ approach by sporting a beard.

For the Boks it was fitting that Victor’s centenary was celebrated with a win, Juan Smith is a revelation, and Francois Hougaard grows in stature with each match.

Next week it’s all going to come down to the wire – it’ll be a season defining match to see who’s going to clinch second spot – it actually feels more like a fight for 3rd and 4th, the AB’s are that far ahead at the moment.

In Ireland, catch Harpin on Rugby  http://www.harpinonrugby.net/ for some innovative thinking on summer rugby and a nifty guide to rugby on TV, and 99Call  http://ninetyninecall.wordpress.com/
has some fab photos of Munster.

All Blacks supernaturally good as they down the Springboks and Leinster/Wasps round up

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John Smit, on the occasion of his 100th cap, sank down on one knee at the end of the match and put his head in his hands. I knew how he felt. The problem is, in the build up to the game, the Boks had been studying the rugby manual instead of ‘Tales of the Supernatural’ which is where their attention should have been focused. When the black beast is down, cut it’s head off, stuff it’s neck with garlic and drive a silver stake through it’s heart. It’s all very well coming to us after the match and telling us you forgot to bring your silver stake, but at this level, those kind of excuses just don’t wash.

Time for the Boks to hold to hold their hands up – they were beaten by a better team. There’s only one team in the world at the moment that could have beaten the Bok’s playing as well as they did and that’s the All Black’s. Every Bok tackle was of bone shuddering intensity, every man gave 110% and the Boks didn’t make more than a handful of mistakes, but they were all pounced upon and turned into points, as the AB’s ignored the altitude and finished much the stronger of the teams.

Their were many outstanding individual performances by the Boks, from Schalk Burger, Gio Aplon, Juan de Jongh, Juan Smith, and Francois Hougaard covered himself in glory. Morne Steyn fluffed his lines a few times, he’s not the complete player they need at 10 yet, and the substitutions on the whole were for less effective players.

For the AB’s, Ritchie McCaw was godlike, Dan Carter mixed it up brilliantly, Corey Jane and Nonu were outstanding and Weepu made a difference when he came on.

It’s all bow down to the new high kings of rugby.

Donnybrook Park was the venue as an understrength Leinster played host to a pretty strength Wasps. It was a friendly, but Wasps certainly look in impressive form going in to the season. Luke Fitzgerald was really sharp, he was a handful every time he got the ball. Sean O’Brien had a solid match, and Isa Nacewa put in a good few bone crunching tackles – there will be a couple of Wasps players still feeling their ribs. I though Trevor Hogan played well , and Heinke van der Merwe had a good solid start – he dropped the ball a couple of times, but I think he’s going to make a big impact, he’s not the biggest player but he’s awesomely strong. Isaac Boss made a difference when he came on.

For Wasps Tom Varndell looked dangerous and in fact the whole backline looks to be in tip top shape. Joe Simpson showed blistering place off the back of the ruck, and Riki Flutey is in good form. Finally in a special ceremony seven minutes before full time, Simon Shaw was presented with his 100th yellow card.

Tri Nations rugby - Boks to take another tumble?

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So these are the teams and a nicer bunch of guys you couldn’t want to meet. Except in an alley on a dark night.


This is the just about the best Bok team they could put out apart from injuries, suspensions, players in France, failed exorcisms, those detained for reasons of insanity and jail inmates. Francois Hougaard at 9 is my main worry – he’s a really good player – but it’s a big ask for a part timer ina specialist role. And big bad Jimmy Cowan is going to be all over him like a rash. A Kockott or a Duvenage has limitations, but has at least played against Cowen and Carter. Aplon is also a bit of a worry too, dynamite on attack but he’s short and could struggle under the high balls.

The All Blacks look typically savagely efficient but they aren’t ten foot tall, and they didn’t look too flash against Australia in the last match, especially in the second half. But in the form they’re in I glumly have to admit it’s unlikely the Boks are going to beat them. All Blacks by 10.

Boks: 15. Gio Aplon, 14. JP Pietersen, 13. Juan de Jongh, 12. Jean de Villiers, 11. Bryan Habana, 10. Morne Steyn, 9. Francois Hougaard, 8. Pierre Spies, 7. Juan Smith, 6. Schalk Burger, 5. Victor Matfield, 4. Flip van der Merwe, 3. Jannie du Plessis, 2. John Smit, 1. Gurthro Steenkamp

Bench: 16. Chiliboy Ralepelle, 17. CJ van der Linde, 18. Danie Rossouw, 19. Francois Louw, 20. Ricky Januarie, 21. Butch James, 22. Wynand Olivier

All Blacks: 15 Mils Muliaina, 14 Cory Jane, 13 Conrad Smith, 12 Ma'a Nonu, 11 Joe Rokocoko, 10 Daniel Carter, 9 Jimmy Cowan, 8 Kieran Read, 7 Richie McCaw (c), 6 Jerome Kaino, 5 Tom Donnelly, 4 Brad Thorn, 3 Ben Franks, 2 Keven Mealamu, 1 Tony Woodcock.

Bench: 16 Corey Flynn, 17 John Afoa, 18 Samuel Whitelock, 19 Victor Vito, 20 Piri Weepu, 21 Aaron Cruden, 22 Israel Dagg.

I caught a look at the new Ireland jersey in Lifestyle Sports at Dundrum, rubbing shoulders with the rich and famous like you do on a Tuesday night. The lable says it‘s blue curacao- new navy. I don’t think the graphic quite does it justice, my languages aren’t great, is curacao Portuguese for baby grower blue maybe?

I’m heading off on Friday to see the Leinster/Wasps match – I see Luke Fitzgerald is back, that’s great for Irish rugby.