Yo lads let's kick it!(Picture from http://bit.ly/efTzKy )
RBS Six Nations
Saturday , March 19
Scotland vs Italy 14:30
Ireland vs England 17:00
France vs Wales 19:45
Last day of the tournament and I’ve got a long post and a lot to say. No wait, come back! It’s all good stuff.
Scotland vs Italy
Last match, last chance saloon for Scotland. Their sole ‘victory’ so far is a plucky six point loss over the English, rather than the more traditional victory when you score more points than the opposition. Moral victories don’t count either, aren’t recorded in the 6 Nations record book. And there’s no justice because with that pack, Scotland should have been a contender. Instead they get to take on Italy, their bogey team, on a high after an unbelievable victory over France (any victory of Italy over France has to be unbelievable), to try and rescue a vestige of pride out of this championship. I suppose the question is, do the Italians feel like they already have the result of the decade, and that their work is done? I’d say yes, they’re not good travellers and Scotland can and will end on a deserved high.
Ireland vs England
There’s history here in this fixture we don’t need to go into, 800 years of it, but on top of that there’s also the little neighbour big neighbour syndrome, and the small guy takes on the giant element as well. Goliath bashing another few dwarves is hardly a story, is it? But when David sorted out Goliath, it was big enough news to make it into the Bible! After 7 wins in a row, is it time to give Goliath a turn?
It’s a tough time for Ireland, the decisions and the results not going our way, the confidence is low, the frustration high. The match has me thinking about our expectations for the Irish team, and I don’t envy Declan Kidney one little bit. With two Heineken cups and a Six Nations Grand Slam under his belt, we have a talented, accomplished coach in charge. He only has four teams to pick from ( well three really as no disrespect but how often does a Connacht player make the team?) and on top of that there are key players from foreign climes in the teams. But there’s a lot of public expectation of what Ireland should achieve, and a lot has been achieved in fairness. We want Ireland to win, but above all we should be celebrating and respecting our players and coach’s for punching way above their weight in the last 5 years.
Kidney has run the changes for the match, Sexton is back, which should mean a running game, Fitzgerald is out, and Trimble gets a start.
England are talking up Ireland for this match, Martin Johnson says they have to respect us, and why wouldn’t they? After watching us scrape past Italy and Scotland, losing to France and getting hockeyed by Wales, you can see the fear in their eyes. Do they mean the respect like they’ll give us a decent burial? They are the form team in the tournament, bursting with big talented players, and I’d prefer them to honest and say it’s theirs to lose, which it is.
Declan Kidney was in fiery form after the last match, looking pretty mean, and after all the talk of respecting players and coaches, what else could I do but give you his team talk in rap form ( sung to tune of ‘Ice Ice Baby’ and my apologies to Vanilla Ice for messing with his deathless prose):
Yo lads let's kick it
Dec Dec baby
Dec Dec baby
All right stop collaborate and listen
Dec is back with his brave new invention
DOC ‘n POC grab a hold of them tightly
That Ashton is looking pretty sprightly
Will he ever stop yo I don't know
Catch the ball and ol’ Earls ain’t slow
To the extreme hit the ruck like a vandal
If they acting ill ‘lip’ll burn them like a candle
If there was a problem yo BOD’ll solve it
Check out the linesman while the ball boy revolves it
CHORUS
Dec Dec baby
Dec Dec baby
Be quick to the point to the point to the breakdown
We’re cooking Haskell like a pound of bacon
Burning them, if they ain't quick and nimble
Go crazy when you hear my signal
J10 and SOB ‘ll pick up the tempo
Get into space and it's time to go so Bowe
They be jealous 'cause we be over the line
Put a mark on Youngs feckin’ gnarly little nine
They be rollin' for their 5.0
In that low chariot so Fodens’ hair can blow
If there was a problem yo BOD'll solve it
Check out the linesman while the ball boy revolves it
Martin Johson get's to reply too: (to the tune of Bob Marleys' Jammin' - adopt your best Jamaican accent)
Ooh, yeah! All right!
We're slammin':
I wanna slam it wid you.
We're slammin', slammin',
And I hope you like slammin', too.
We're slammin' -
To think that slammin' was a thing of the past;
We're slammin',
And I hope this slam is gonna last
Yeah, we're - we're slammin' (wotcha-wa),
Wotcha-wa-wa-wa, we're slammin' (wotcha-wa),
See, I wanna slam it wid you
We're slammin' (slammin' slammin', slammin')
I'm slammed: I hope you're slammin', too.
Right so decision time, who’s going to win? My head says England, my heart says Ireland, going with my heart!
France vs Wales
Depending on how Ireland get on Wales could still be in the running for the 6 Nations, but they are going to have to thump France to make up the points difference. France only have pride to play for at this stage. The mercurial Lievremont has made 5 changes for the match – now there’s a surprise! Would love to see him choosing a wine in a restaurant, the place would be closed by the time he’d made his mind up. He still gets to bring in players like Marty and Traille though, France should be doing SO much better than they are! Wales lose the outstanding Shane Williams, who has now played his last 6 Nations match, and North has been brought into the squad. They have three wins in arrow, and are on a bit of a roll. The one thing we know for certain about how the French will play is that we don’t have a clue what they will do. Could Wales catch the backlash from their abject 6 Nations, or will we see the lamest French showing since they got walloped by the Walabies? Hard to call, going with France because they have to come right some time, and at home is the place to do it.
And happy St Patrick's day everyone!
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